missing someone.............

do you miss someone??

I am missing my Pappaw Harlow. He died in April 2002, just a month before I got married. I was so sad, I wanted him to be at my wedding so bad. What makes me really sad is that Mazzy doesn't know who he is. I really wish she could have known him. He adored kids, always making us laugh with his silly stories. He used to make all of us grandkids pile into his bedroom and sing Christmas songs while he played the harmonica, while recording us. We hated it so much, we would try to run when we saw him get that harmonica out. But right now, I wish we were there singing with him. People used to say he looked like George Burns. If he had darker rimmed glasses and a cigar in his mouth he would look just like him. We laughed at him all the time.
I can hear his laugh and smell that distinct smell. He was in his 80's when he died, I can't remember his exact age. The only gray hair he had was a little tiny bit on the hair around his ears. His hair was always dark brown. I don't know what he used in his hair, but it kept it from turning gray!! He was such a cute old man. :-)
I need to find pics of him and post them with this post.
I will never forget the day he died....we were all in the hospital room with him when he took his last breath. Mammaw was holding his hand and he was really not with us for a while. He was just slowly going and didn't acknowledge his surroundings.
Once he looked up at the ceiling and reached his hand out, with a surprised/excited look on his face as if he was reaching for someone. The room was silent, when a boy, maybe around 16 or so walked in, shut the door behind him and just stood there with his head down. It was seconds after he left the room that Pappaw took his last breath. Everyone saw him and no one knew who he was. We looked for him down the hall thinking he walked into the wrong room. But he was no where to be found. I am sure it was his Angel coming for him. It was the neatest thing I've ever experienced. I miss him so much, I think about him every day.

bye-bye binky

UPDATE:
Well, it's been over a week. She's done so good. I can't even believe how good she's done. For someone who had to have 5+ binky's in her bed, one in her hand, one in her mouth. She's done pretty good. She asked for one yesterday, but again, I explained to her that they are all gone and she just said OK. My baby is growing up. I want to see her with a binky in her mouth so bad, that's the only thing that makes her a baby. But she's growing and I have to deal with it. Makes me wanna cry!

Friday morning I got Mazzy up to go to Deanie's. Just a normal day. Just like every morning, I told her to go to her room and get her binky and something to cuddle with at nap time. (Bunny was dirty) She told me she didn't want her binky and refused to take it. SO, I said OK and went on to take her to Deanie's. (I did put one in my pocket) When we got there, I told Deanie that she said she didn't want binky and to put her to bed without it. I gave her the one from my pocket just incase she cried for it.
I went to pick her up that evening and Deanie told me she didn't ask for it at all and slept like normal. Even with Brianna crying for hers, Mazzy still never asked for it. So Friday night I put her to bed, she asked for her binky but I told her that she told me she didn't want it anymore and they were all gone. She just looked at me so sad and said ok. She slept fine that night, she got up a few times, but finally went to sleep. She's gone the whole entire weekend without it and only cried for her binky twice. Both times I explained to her that she said she didn't want her binky anymore and they were gone. She thinks that they are in the trash. Really they are in a zip lock bag on top of the fridge. :-) I'm so proud of her. She did this herself, it was her decision, which makes it much easier. She's not had her binky since Thursday night, so it's totally gone. She's not getting it back! I refuse to give it to her. I know she'll cry a few more times for it but she'll eventually forget she even had one. My baby girl is growing up so fast. Getting rid of the binky really means she's not a baby anymore. Makes me sad, but happy at the same time.

wellness challenge..

I'm doing pretty good at it, but I still crave little debbie fancy cakes!!! I am addicted to Little Debbie's. :-) I've done pretty good for the first 3 days. I've had no fried foods, no full calorie soft drinks, no sweet tea (which I also crave), no chocolate, etc.... It's very hard. I drink a lot of Coke Zero, I don't like water, but I try. This is the first time I've ever tried to watch what I eat and drink. I've never wanted to lose weight before, I always had a great metabolism. But after I had Mazzy that all changed. I've gained almost 20lbs since I've had her. That's what I want to lose, to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight. Hopefully after the 6 week challenge I will be in a habit of eating healthier and keep it up. Thanks to Meredith for getting this started.
How about you? Have you made a New Year's Resolution to lose weight?? How are you doing at it?

P.S. a friend of mine is on a diet, she doesn't like water. She said that drinking water from a Pal's tea cup has helped her. I have also heard if you drink through a straw, you drink more. (info from Kristi)

I'll keep things updated on here on how I do.

My Poor Baby......

She fell down our front steps Saturday! They are concrete steps!!
She decided she would try to get outside to the car before us, she always walks with her hands in her pockets, so we won't hold her hand. *She's a big girl now ya know*
I stepped inside to get my cat her catfood and when I came back she was face down on the steps, crying. SCARED ME TO DEATH!! I picked her up and all I saw was blood on her face. Eric grabbed her to make sure she didn't do any major damage to her teeth or eye. She cried for a minute and then said "I OK MOMMA". Ofcourse I cried......if anyone knows me, you know what a rough life she AND I have had! For those of you who don't know, she's had a fractured femur, she's been shocked by a baby monitor charger, and now this! She's fine though, nothing to worry about. She looks bad, but luckily her eye didn't get black, just scratched. It looks like she hit her eye and slid down a step or two and scratched her cheek and nose. I've attached a picture of her. You can't tell too much, it was taken with my phone.
This is just one of many accidents to come!!